My mom use to say, "You've got the same rags to get glad in." My sister, brother and I just always thought that was a funny "Momism." Then recently, I started recognizing people around me walking around like Eeyore - waiting for the sky to fall, moaning and groaning with a cloud of negative energy surrounding them. For instance, a friend of my brother's was talking to me over the holidays about his upcoming January melancholy, misery and gloom. I said, "What do you mean?" He said, "I get it every year, it will be here soon." Frankly it sounded like the next holiday coming up the way he was waiting for it almost with glee. I thought about that comment for about a day and realized what my mom meant. I am almost sixty years old, and I finally get it! So here's what I would say:
- See your doctor for a check up. You may need medication (which is a whole other topic for a later time). You may have seasonal affect disorder, something very treatable.
- Adjust your lens! Remember kaleidascopes? When the top of the tube was turned, you could see all different colors moving around. Never was one the same. So, what that means, is change your lens. And for goodness sake, change your words!
- Think about someone else that may need the very thing you can give. A hug, a kind word, a surprise bunch of flowers.
Here is an example of the conversation I had over the holidays and what it needs to be instead:
"I have experienced depression in January for several years."
OK. So you know what to expect so how can you shift your thinking to produce a different result? Knowing what to expect gives you time to gather the tools and resources you need to combat the same ole' hamster wheel.
Because let me tell you something, every time you speak those words of illness, depression, anxiety, stress, failure or whatever with expectation, you breathe life right into what you are anticipating. Stop talking about all the things that are wrong. Stop talking about all of the things you are afraid of and instead talk about the things you are confident about. Talk about the things you know beyond a shadow of a doubt. Discipline yourself to find at least three positives in your life and focus on them. How can you make those areas even more positive? How can those positive areas give you strength to change the 'same ole same ole'?
I know this strategy works because I use it on a regular basis. It is not easy, but so worth the effort. That's when the magic happens.
If you need guidance on how to 'get there' schedule a free consult: U Power Coaching